Just wait...

listening to "Julia" by Our Lady Peace
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To wait...

Just wait....

Love will find you....

Let it all happen in it's own time...

I've been told over and over my entire life. But when will "wait" end? Do I have to wait until the day that God calls me home. I just want to find him. I want to be with him. I know I'm only 24 years old. But those who say "you're only 24. You're so young. You have your whole life ahead of you." I just want to punch them in the face.

Yeah I mean that.

I know it's not very Christian of me. I know it's really violent. And I don't like it. But I openly admit that when I hear that... that is EXACTLY what goes through my head. Followed by "You have no idea what I feel. You say you do. But you don't. No one feels exactly the same things. So you can't say that. Why can't you see that? Just leave me alone!"

Why do I chase a dream that will never be? I need to accept that the feelings will not be returned. I could have been in a car accident yesterday. My plane could crash tomorrow. My heart could give out on me right now. And I would die "waiting".

I don't want to wait anymore.

I just want to be loved and love them back.