Opening Up My Heart

Ok so there's no denying the fact that I have a really big crush on a friend of mine, AJ Cheek from the band Nevertheless. See the guys came in to the station for an interview and stuff before we all headed for lunch and then to a show in Muskegon. But we had a few 'visitors' before we left. Yeah . That's right... thanks to Sierra & Lemke there is no doubt in my mind that AJ knows that I like him.

So now I'm down to only 2 fears when it comes to AJ.... 1.. that he may not like me back... and 2... that he may think the only reason I like him is because of his band. If that were the case then I would have crush on every band I've met. Think about it. When I first met eleventyseven... Caleb was VERY single. But Caleb is sort of like my little brother. He likes to pick on me in every way possible and I pick back.

I had a crush on Jon Neufeld. I admit that. But that's behind me. I've been over Jon. Basically we stopped talking and my crushed slowly faded with it.

But there's something about AJ. Britanny (Nevertheless' drummer, Adam Rowe's girl friend) asked me on friday what it is about AJ that I like so much. I couldn't give her one thing. He has the most beautiful hazel eyes I've ever seen. His smile makes me giggle like a 13 year old who just discovered boys do NOT have cooties.

The way he teases me about bands that I don't like... one in particular is the most adorable thing I've ever seen. How he brushes his hair to the right side of his forehead every few minutes... His laugh... His enourmous heart... his accent... his southern charm... the list goes on. There's just something about him I just can't seem to shake.

Why I'm writing this in a blog I don't know. I should be telling him. I should have told him on Friday when he & I wer saying goodbye outside of the WaYfm Envoy and the Nevertheless Van. I should have hugged him tighter... held on a little longer... forget that... I just should have told him.

This is me... opening up my heart that I have kept locked up tightly for years. I am taking a risk that I'm not used to taking. I'm putting my heart out there for AJ to take for his own... since it is his already... or for him to turn and walk away.

Either way.... AJ... if you're reading this... I am willing to keep this as friendship only. I'd rather have your friendship than nothing at all. I just can't deny my heart any longer. I don't know if this is God's will or not. But if it is... who am I to hide under a rock and not allow his will to be done.

- Stacey -

There's a Wann growing out of my head!

Oh where to start....

Big Ticket was a blast and a half. I got to see one of my best friends, Wynnde. So that was super cool... Oh my sweet cookies! Did I seriously say 'super cool' *goes back and re-reads* I did... *hangs head in shame*

Well I got to visit with my friends, Brian & Katie from 3:16. I haven't seen them in a while. So I really geeked when I found out they were going to be there. Wynnde immediatly fell in love with thier music and thier merch table had a really good turn out. They did some really great songs from thier cd "At The Gate" and of course Katie and to go and point me out mentioning WaYfm... The show wasn't for me, Katie. hahaha

I got to see the guys from Story Side:B again also. Was really happy about that. Sadly I didn't get to try sushi like I was supposed to. :( Next time guys. I promise.

The one thing I am the most excited about though (No offense to 3:16 and Story Side:B - cause I saw them a lot more recently) is that I got to see my friends from Nevertheless. Can you believe it's been a year since I last saw them? We hung out quite a bit and a more laughs than should be allowed. For instance... ok there are 5 guys in the band... Joshua (lead vocals), Wann (Adam number Wann (yeah corney joke from Joshua - Wann plays the Bass), AJ (Lead guitar), Brad (Rhythmic guitar) & Rowe (Another Adam who plays drums)... anyway... We were all hang out at the merch table and I was leaning up against a post in the pavilion and Wann was also... I was like laying on it with my right shoulder and my arms wrapped around it for some reason. Wann had his right arm propped above my head (since he's a lot taller than I am) and then Wynnde gave me something to set down next to our stuff and when I turned I ran into Wann's arm. Only thing is when I moved so did his arm... he just left it pressed against my head and said that I tried to take it from him... All I could think of to say was "Wynnde! There's a Wann growing out of my head!"

That's one story of MANY... just know that the guys REALLY liked to tease me! Between Josh and Wynnde I have no idea who enjoyed teasing me more. But I think out of all of them I think Brad got me the best in one shot... Brad... I'll get you back for that one. hahahaha Let's just say that I got so embarassed that I took off running and hid... yeah I don't do that very often! But I probably deserved it.

Another is that Brad, Wann & Rowe wrote "AJ" on the back of AJ's neck so then Brad ended up with "Brad" on the back of his and then Wann got tagged with "A.W." But I saw AJ's first and then I pointed it out to Wynnde as he was walking away and as soon as she saw it we started laughing really hard and he gave us a look of "What'd I do?" So then we later had to explain why we were laughing. He obviously knew it was there. But it was just funny cause Wynnde made the comment of "Someone forgot his name and so they wrote it on his neck to keep track of who's who." hahaha

And with that I am going to get back to work cuase I'm at the Jessie Daniels show right now and I'm supposed to be signing people up for the WaYfm Street Squad and the WaYfm Music Crew. Now if only people would come out here and sign up... but hey she just started singing "The Noise" and I'm still not seeing anyone coming out so I'm assuming they're enjoying it. THAT'S GREAT NEWS!!!

- Stacey -














This is Josh














Introducing Adam Rowe














My buddy Adam Wann














That'd be Brad














Yep. That's AJ.

Girl Guts

"Raindrops" by: Armor For Sleep
*****************************
So I was at the WaYfm werbsite, http://www.way.fm tonight watching videos when one REALLY stuck out at me. It's a song I've known inside and out for a long time.. but I guess... like something else in my life... I never really let it 'grab a hold of me' until now.

Chad, Natalie's boyfiend and a good friend of mine has this thing he likes to tease us girls (Natalie, Wynnde, Leslie & I) about. He says we need to 'grow girl guts'. Since none of us... ok well... not Leslie... are really bad at being risk takers. This is something I'm sure you're WELL aware of by now that I have a problem with.

Well something really BIG is about to happen to me. No I'm not saying "Oo! I can predict the future!" Cause I can't. This is something I've known about and have been planning. Well the time is LITTERALLY moments away and I am on pins and needles so to speak.

I made the comment to Wynnde a little earlier about how I am both extremely excited and more nervous than I have ever been in my life. I truly mean that.

I don't know what God has planned. I don't know why this is happening. I wasn't even supposed to be there. But here I am... with the clock ticking down to this moment.

As I... ok lay here... in my room only lit by the screen from my monitor... my mind begins to wander to that moment. That first initial moment. What's going to happen? How will I react? What will be the outcome? All these questions and many senarios that poor Wynnde has had to endure over and over hearing about have been bouncing off the shell of my brain like a ping pong ball in mid play.

I can't sleep. When I do... it's restless and for short periods of time.

Forget focusing on one certain thing. My mind keeps drifting to this day... this hour.. this second...

I was asked yesterday by lead singer, Lu from Story Side: B if I was married becuase I wear 2 rings on the ring finger of my left hand and because I am so young.

I explained to him about the Claudaugh and that I wear it like that because my heart is taken by the man I am going to marry one day.. whomever he may be. I don't know if I have met him yet... but if I have... there's one man that I have my heart set on.

No. Not Jon. Or the guy I met a few months ago that I couldn't stop thinking about. This is a guy that I met a while ago. Someone who I fell for the day I met. But I suppressed it thinking that it could never be and that I needed to focus on what I had and other parts of my life.

These feelings have been building up this entire time. Every time his name was brought up. Everytime I heard something that reminded me of him. The feelings built up a little more. Only I didn't know it until I got over the whole Nick thing.

Now this is what I mean by 'girl guts'. I'm taking a risk of this man reading this and figuring out that it's him before the 'moment' arrives... or even after for that matter.

But since I've done so much rambling.. that I'm quite good at :) I will end now. Sorry for either boring you... or making you go completely crazy out of confusion.

- Stacey Ree -