NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Listening to: "I Need You" by: Jamestown Theory (previously And Then I Turned Seven)
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Ok so I am SO frustrated right now. I stinkin' want to watch my show, Greek. I can't cause the season is over and the only way to watch it online is to purchase each episode from Itunes. Of course I can't do that. THIS STINKS!!!!!

I NEED MY CAPPIE FIX!

- needing some rusty/cappie time -

*gag*

Listening to: "Cry In My Heart" by: Starfield
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I just ate my salad without any cheese....

Ok there is something VERY wrong with a salad that has NO cheese!

I had romaine lettuce (my favorite), Sesame Seeds & Raspberry Vinagerette (Also my favorite) Dressing

Just wanted to share in my frustration.


-k- bye...
-Stacey-

Here goes nothin...

listening to: "Cat And Mouse" by: The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
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I got a new layout! YIPPIE!!!! Took long enough! lol

Well as you can tell from the title of this entry I am about to embark on something MAJOR. In just over a week I am making the trip for the first time EVER to Chicago. I'm geeked. I'm nervous. I have never even seen the skyline so if you know of anything good to do there for the weekend PLEASE let me know.

Also. I have made a pact with 2 of my best friends. We have been having some difficulty with one specific issue. So we made a pact today that we will NOT give up hope and not let each other give up hope and give up on each other.

I LOVE YOU GIRLS! I'm so glad I have friends like you to hold me to this! Corey, Les... I have not forgoten about you two. You can hold me to it too if you want. I love you both! I miss you! I hope to see you soon!

- Stacey -

What Can I Say?

listening to: "Pretty, Handsom, Awkward" by: The Used
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I really don't have anything to say. I'm just wasting time... I live such an exciting life don't I? lol

Well I lied... here's something to say... I'm really mad at myself cause I went out to the barn the other day to find my winter jacket since ya know it gets cold in Michigan and all... NOPE! I think I left it in Tennessee! I'm smart!!!

*singing*

Yeah I seriously got nothing... Hey I need to know cooler template ideas for my blog. I'm kind of over this one and the blogger ones are old too. Anyone know of any good sites? Does anyone read this anyway... besides you, Corey. Put your hand down. lol

Spaz... Out...
- Stacey Ree -

WHAT THE????

Listening to: "Somewhere Only We Know" by: Keane
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Ok is it just me or are there movies and songs that you've NEVER heard and NEVER seen before that show up and grab your attention that explain your EXACT life at that EXACT moment??????

YEAH! I HATE THAT!!!!!!

- Stacey -

The search is over!!

listening to: "Darl'n" by: Between The Trees (thanks Sara!)
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So I did it. I finally found Matt's grave. Thanks to everyone who has been so supportive of me with this issue over the years. Jennifer helped me find it. She even took time out of her schedule to go with me when I went to say goodbye. Only problem is that we didn't find it at the cemetary. Whoever thought up the idea to have flat gravestones so that you could mow OVER them and cover them up was obviously not thinking from my perspective.

But I got a hold of the Cemetery a few days later and they posted a flag to mark it for me. So Natalie went with me that day. I parked my car EXACTLY where I parked it when Jennifer and I went. Matt was directly to my left.

I was ok until I could actually read his name. Then I lost it. Nat was such a good friend for just letting me have my cry and say my goodbye 15 years late. We had to of been there for a half hour or so. I just sat there talking to him and brushing the grass from his headstone.

I made it. It just took me a while. I wish that I would been able to go to the funeral. But there had to be some reason I couldn't. I wish I would have been able to find his grave years ago. But having a best friend die at 12 was hard enough. I honestly don't think I would have been able to handle it the way that I had the other day.

God has a reason for everything. I found it. That's all I needed. God understands how much that means to me and know that I understand that Matt isn't really there... just his body is. I still have my moments. But dealing with this for as long as I have and on my own makes me know that I will ALWAYS have moments. I accept that. But I feel more at ease with myself and Matt's death now.

I wish you would have known him. You would have loved him. He was a great friend. He would have been happy to accept you as his friend. He would have been proud of who I am. He always knew that I was going to achieve my dream of working in the music industry. He knew I was going to move to Tennessee one day. He had faith. He gave me faith.

The anniversary of his death is next month. I can't believe it's been 15 years. I miss him. But I always will. He knows I'll be back. This time I'm going to take him flowers.